What Post-Deconstruction Season Are You In?

I wanted to do something a little different today, especially for those of you who are having a hard time being kind to yourselves lately. Maybe that's you, and if so, keep reading. (If I’m honest, I’m doing this for myself too. I needed this reminder just as much). Sometimes I forget what it means to be a normal, messy, beautifully human being.

Do you know what I mean?

There are moments when I forget I’m a living, breathing organism that’s meant to ebb and flow; not stay perfectly “fixed” or constant. I get caught up in rigid “shoulds” and “must-bes,” thinking there’s only one “right” way to feel or heal.

Whenever I catch myself in these thoughts (sometimes in the moment, sometimes a week later), I gently remind myself that our lives (and bodies, and emotions, and relationships, and... and...) are meant to be cyclical and seasonal, full of:

❄️ Tender winters
🍂 Slow falls
🌱 Hopeful springs
☀️ Radiant summers

Sometimes these cycles unfold over years. Other times, we feel them all in a single day.

When we stop trying to attain some rigid, final state and open ourselves up to something more expansive, we begin to see that each season has something to teach us. Each one is exactly where we’re meant to be.

Immediately, this perspective creates a sense of relief from the suffocating grip of binary thinking.

That’s why I wanted to create this quiz for you. Think of it as a soft invitation to check in with yourself, see what season you’re in, and maybe offer yourself spaciousness and compassion for wherever you are finding a lot of judgment, rigidity, or “shoulds” in your life currently. 

Here’s how to do it:

1. Read each question.
2. Choose the option that feels most true for you.
3. Add up your points and see which season you’re in below.

What Post-Deconstruction Season Are You In Quiz👇🏽

1. How do you feel about your past beliefs and religious community?
A) Raw and grieving (1)
B) Numb, retreating inward (2)
C) Cautiously hopeful, starting to explore (3)
D) Excited and expansive (4)

2. How do you relate to your sense of self?
A) I don’t know who I am anymore (1)
B) I’m questioning it all and keeping inward (2)
C) I’m experimenting with new parts of me (3)
D) I feel grounded in who I’m becoming (4)

3. How are you connecting with your body and emotions?
A) Disconnected or overwhelmed (1)
B) Reflective, tending gently (2)
C) Curious, starting to explore (3)
D) In tune and welcoming pleasure (4)

4. What does your support system look like?
A) I feel isolated and misunderstood (1)
B) Some safe people but mostly alone (2)
C) Slowly building new connections (3)
D) Surrounded by aligned people (4)

5. When you imagine the future, what feels most true?
A) I can’t imagine it yet (1)
B) I feel cautious, wanting safety (2)
C) A bit unsure but excited (3)
D) Open and ready for new possibilities (4)

6. How do you relate to the idea of rest?
A) I avoid it, feel guilty (1)
B) I need it but feel unsure (2)
C) Learning to allow it (3)
D) Embrace it with ease (4)

7. When old religious beliefs come up, what happens?
A) They feel intrusive and painful (1)
B) I observe but feel stuck (2)
C) I gently question them (3)
D) They hold little power now (4)

8. What feels the most supportive for you right now?
A) Being held and comforted (1)
B) Quiet solitude and reflection (2)
C) New experiences and small steps (3)
D) Celebrating and sharing (4)

9. How would you describe your relationship with joy?
A) Disconnected from it (1)
B) Fleeting moments, feels scary (2)
C) Starting to seek and enjoy it (3)
D) Welcoming it openly (4)

10. Which metaphor resonates most?
A) A bare winter tree (1)
B) Falling leaves, letting go (2)
C) A bud reaching for sun (3)
D) A sunflower turning toward light (4)

Add Up Your Points:

• 10–15 points → Winter ❄️

• 16–23 points → Fall 🍂

• 24–31 points → Spring 🌱

• 32–40 points → Summer ☀️

Your Season Explained

❄️ Winter: Deep Rest & Grief 
You’re in a tender, inward season. This is a time to honor your grief, tend to wounds, and offer yourself deep compassion. You are not broken; you are simply gathering wisdom in the quiet solitude

Try this: Simply ask yourself, “What do you need right now?” 

🍂 Fall: Letting Go & Reflecting 
You’re in a season of releasing old layers and questioning what no longer fits. You might feel the pull inward, making space for what’s next. Be gentle as you shed old identities and beliefs.

Try this: Write down one belief or story you’re ready to set down, then gently tear up or burn the paper as a small release ritual.

🌱 Spring: Emerging & Experimenting
You’re starting to stretch into new ideas, new self-expression, and cautious optimism. This is a season of trying, playing, and gentle growth. Celebrate every small sprout.

Try this: Choose one small thing that feels new or playful: wear a bold color, try a new recipe, or take a different walking route. Let it be an experiment.

☀️ Summer: Blooming & Embodying
You’re stepping boldly into new ways of living and being. You feel more confident, aligned, and open to joy and connection. This is your time to shine and share your reclaimed self with the world.

Try this: Share something you’re proud of with someone you trust: a creative project, a small win, or simply a truth about yourself. Let yourself be seen and celebrated.

I’d really love to hear from you. What season do you think you’re in right now?

It feels like a fall season for me. I've been noticing old layers, questioning what no longer fits, and slowly making space for what’s next.